Too Hick to be Square: We're calling it ‘sprinter’

When we get the whole team on the job, it doesn’t actually take that long to shovel out our driveway. All it takes is half an hour, a few snowballs, and a couple snowbank dumpings (and only a few of those were mine).
By : 
Lydia Hanson
Spring Valley Tribune

It has come to my attention that although my calendar says it’s nearly the end of April, it isn't particularly springy outside.

I think it was the third 50-degree day followed by a major dumping of four inches of wet snow that gave it away. Blizzards are rarely subtle.

And the first clue should have been when Easter fell on April Fools Day this year. It was just a clever trick to make us think spring was somewhere around the corner. Personally, I think Minnesota got bored and decided to mix things up by combining winter and spring into an entirely new season I’m calling “sprinter.”

In case anyone was wondering, I don’t approve of the change. However, I’ve been thinking this past week and have managed to come up with four reasons why it’s actually totally OK that there is still snow on the ground in late April. 

1) The Clan obviously needed just one more chance to have a big, whole-family bonding experience shoveling the entire driveway for half an hour — while the snow is, of course, still coming down. 

Luckily, we got it, so I think we’re all good for the rest of the year now. I’m just hoping that the snow will agree with us.

2) Minnesota is actually a wonderful state and is doing us a favor by giving all us die-hard Minnesotans one more chance to do what we do best: complain about the weather. 

It’s pretty simple when you think about it. Our state is as passive-aggressively “nice” as we are. It might be trying to tell us something, but it sure as heck isn’t going to come right out and tell us what it is!

3) The young inexperienced drivers in the Clan are going to get one last lesson on winter driving in icy, slick, and otherwise hazardous road conditions. I’ve been driving for four winters now, and I’m still receiving lessons. 

Most of them are variations on the themes of Probably Should Have Taken That Turn Slower and Your Tires Are Skidding, Let Off The Gas!

Like I said, it’s great.

4) The fairly cool temperatures mean we’re able to use the outside freezer/refrigerator for a little longer. And by that, I mean we can put loaves of bread in the space between the door and the railing for what may eventually be a walk-out porch off the kitchen/dining room (but which is at the moment just a door that opens onto nothing eight feet off the ground). 

The outside freezer/refrigerator is a very handy storage space during the months where we have below or near freezing temperatures all the time. We have to monitor it now in case the odd 50-degree day sneaks in, but on the whole, it’s an excellent system.

These are all fairly decent (albeit not entirely convincing) reasons why it’s actually OK that we still have snow on the ground this far into April.